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you would have picked wrong.

the people you were don’t exist anymore. if it pushed you to the bottom of the ocean, it’s not the same you that will break the surface.

of course your younger parts will want it all to make sense, and if not now, then soon. but that’s not how it works. the answer is the process. the mystery isn’t the story. “what happens now? i didn’t want it to end this way!” rather, it’s, “who must i become now? now that i know? with these feelings that i hadn’t felt before?”

have you ever tried to stir sugar into cold liquid? it can take a long time or you can simply give up, leaving crystals at the bottom of the glass. what you need to do to integrate the experience is to introduce energy. generating heat is just making molecules move faster. so you’re going to move faster, using all the new energy that’s flooding your system, and that’s how you turn sugar into sweetness.

you’ll realize that you were simply being made to choose the person you are becoming over the person who left. had it gone any other way, you would have picked wrong. because nobody wants illness, loss or destruction. we want to be happy. we want to be rewarded with certainty. but remember that when the body breaks, the soul grows. comfort is death. happy = growth. the universe already knows who needs to go and when the new you needs to come in.